her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
I'm passing your future prison.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Dont... please don't. Don't fuck him on his bean bag bed
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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