I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
I've really got to stop smuggling half full bottles of beer out of bars in my purse.
I sat alone in Buffalo Wild Wings eating chocolate cake on Country Western karoake night. The waiter asked me if I was ok. Twice.
I'm also glad were at the point in our friendship where my vagina talking to you isn't weird
i knew it was time to leave the bar when i caught myself doing karate dance moves with a married man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
my pupils became my eyes and i slept with a cloth in my mouth again
Do you remember peeing in the sink while I was throwing up?
No ma'am, I do not. I found a video of us trying to do a trust fall though. Emphasis on the trying.
It wasn't a great time! You grabbed me, picked me up, and make me pee in the sink!
Did my roommate wake up in your girlfriend's apartment in drag again?
Randomize