Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
If I would have known that wiping my dick on her pillow would have caused her to leave........
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
bought some hannah montana deodorant. hope it doesnt make me smell untalented
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
its preseason football. its like non alcoholic beer. who gives a fuck
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
Bro, there is a rent-a-cop selling syringes out of the trunk of his car. This is why I hate the DMV.
Dude, just found out there's a monster in a video game named after me. No more dating nerds.
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
Prop 8 repealed and I FINALLY got my period. Good day for America!!!
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Randomize
