People in love make me want to vomit
She is only going home with him in hopes to give him herpes. She has been plotting some master revenge since 7th grade.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
The cop refused to sing with us, even though he was as happy as we were that the tow truck finally showed up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well on a positive note, crystal light now comes in margarita flavor
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
This baby is an asshole
It was a great idea until we got stuck in a ditch. We had to call redneck cousin 1
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
I'm on day 4 of clean eating. I call it the "whore by June" program
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Randomize