I just want you to know that me val and amanda are drinking on top of a hill lookig at the chicago skyline drinking icehouse and we just peed in public.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
Go to petsmart and tell me if the dog trainer is the guy I slept with friday. Thanks.
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
I think I just asked the Greek gyro guy on a yoga date.
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
Everyone here knows my boyfriend as "Half Baked". Life, he's doing it right.
There's green glitter on my nipple rings. #mardigras2013
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Just got road head. In broad daylight. On the interstate. During rush hour. Pushing the envelope one public bj at a time.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
I've never seen anyone as high as you were.. you collapsed onto the kitchen floor hugging a tub of ice cream. You named it phil.
Randomize
