I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
I just had an epiphany. There is NOTHING TO STOP ME from making cake mix and eating it all instead of making a cake. It feels like my entire life has peaked at this moment.
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
bro your seconds weren't very sloppy last night, is everything ok?
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Opted for cash back rather than the 10% extra I'd get for store credit, solely for drinks tonight.
You're lovely.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got "plug" during family Catch Phrase and struggled to not make a reference to butt plug so I skipped it
He wanted me to choke him with my feet. So now I feel obligated to start writing my memoir
That portion can talk about stepping out of your comfort zone and how it can potentially kill people
He brought me hungover chipotle knowing full well he wasn't getting a blow job. I think he may be too in love with me.
Okay so it turns out that my bf keeps a log of every time I sleep-fart. It's dated back to 2013.
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
I am no longer embarassed by my vagina
It concerns why you would be in the first place, but I'd rather not know
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