worst 3rd wheel sitch ever. i'm crammed into a booth with him and chubs mcgee and his hand is between her legs. thank youuu karma.
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
So Ive been fucking her for the past couple months and i just found our that my grandfather and her grandmother were fuck buddies for a while. I feel like this is a new awesome family tradition that skips a generation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm at the grocery store buying monistat and corn nuts. thank god for self check out.
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm busy watching infomercials. I'd say I'll join you later, but I'm doing a shot every time they demonstrate how difficult life is WITHOUT this product. So I doubt I'll be able to walk in another... Maybe 40 minutes.
But feel free to join! A new infomercial starts in 12 minutes.
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Hungover. No words. Just memes.
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
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