We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
If by any chance I go to the hospital make sure you stuff a pint in my pockets so I can keep up.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
Drink for every country you've never heard of.
Fuuuuuuuuuck
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
If you hear a sad honk in the wind it is me.
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
