gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Woke up with pink eye in both my eyes. That's how the threesome went
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
sober me is the one who makes bad decisions every boyfriend I've ever had I met sober
Randomize
