i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Wow, Pearl Harbor and The Notebook are on. Its like the Im going to kill myself marathon.
I don't think you'd be able to understand Inception if you weren't high...
Naturally, I just peed all over the floor. Two guys in front of me looked at me, but i just shrugged. They won't remember either.
It may be that your sole purpose in life is simply to serve as a warning to others..
I found out during it when he said "my girlfriend never does this" so he's all to blame, I had no idea until half way through.
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
sexting foreigners is the best. they respond with silly things like "love that tits"
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
Snow days are when you really appreciate that your neighbor is on your bang roster.
Let this be a lesson to you, parmesan cheese crumbles are not a good substitute for coffee creamer, no matter how high you are
im ready to get drunk and forget everything ive learned this semester
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
Randomize
