Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
May i just say it is extremely difficult to pee in a cape
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
i'm 6 minutes and 3 drinks deep before she gets here. she's do-able for a wednesday night, but i still need to mentally prepare, ya know?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
How did I pull off convincing everyone that my name is Dad? Maybe they were just distracted by my boobs.
i'm eating pizza lunchables and telling my boyfriend he can do better than me because i am a functional adult
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I supernannyed him into submission
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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