So today I found out that our school is known as the herpes school
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
Its a little weird going to a wedding where I've screwed the bride and my wife has screwed the groom. Great wedding though.
Fairly certain I cracked a rib. Masturbation is not for the weak. I die now.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I'm on the bus, watching a girl shush her balloons.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize
