My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
have u ever looked at the reflection of the water n watched the poop come out of u?
why can't you just be normal
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
& he told me 'I don't think ur a big slut-just kind of an average slut'
HE THINKS THATS A COMPLIMENT!!!!!
Then you screamed "fuck her like shes not your sister tonight" at the people walking down the road.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
All i've had today is coffee and ketchup packets. I need a job like yesterday.
You know you turned your life around when your drunk eating salad at 3 am on a Friday night
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
Nothing like walk of shaming to the bus stop in your bar clothes at noon and seeing the fire truck you work on drive past with the other shift giving you thumbs up.. Brotherhood at its finest
"hahahaha" is not a sufficient reply when I tell you my mother laughed at a joke about me giving blowjobs.
Is it just me or did we have a heart to heart talk while you were naked last night?
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
Randomize
