you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
the lady in the checkout infront of me had a case of beer, two 40 oz, and activia...really??i dont' think irregularity is her problem
He is like the real live version of the state fair..
how do i tell her that i need alcohol to fuck her but at the same time i cant get a hard on with alcohol.
He screamed for everyone to hide, unplugged the music, then talked to the cop. Last I saw he was high fiving him...
He's the fucking cop whisperer.
Like I had to call my dad because I couldn't manage to unlock the door. And when he got there to open it I was climbing the gate to get in.
I need a hug and tequila
I'm sitting next to a milk crate full of tequila right now
This is why we need to live in the same city again
No. Nooooo. No way. She looked like Amanda Bynes. The recent one not the one from All That.
I have his gate key so know he has to see me again.
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
I have mastered the art of having sex on monkey bars.
Randomize
