i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
I never thought I would say this but I have to clean queso off my vibrator
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
Antibacterial soap and prayers does not for spermicide make
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She asked me to dress as captain planet for halloween and told me she was gonna suck the pollution out of my dick.
Can we just talk about the fact that the last time I got laid I was wearing a Jurassic Park tshirt?
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
75% of the time I swipe right on Bumble for girls over 40 is because I think their 18 year old daughter is hot.
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
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