i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
worst hand job ever. my dick is about as raw as that sushi your mom wanted me to try.
in retrospect, sexting while high was a mistake - I meant to say "I'll fuck you stupid, baby" but of course I said "I'll fuck your stupid baby"
I woke up in my girlfriends bed with another guy laying next to me. wtf.
This is one of the fundamental differences between you and I. If I found meat in a plastic bag, I wouldn't put it in my mouth.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
and honestly how many chances will you get to hook up with a one armed guy?
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
Teacher vividly described one of the times he did shrooms, sat down, sighed, and told everyone to go do drugs and let us out 15 minutes into class. I love community colleges
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