redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
all of your clothes are in the front law. btw..sprinklers go on in 20 minutes
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
Yeah, all the sudden I heard a loud "ding" and realized I had been passed out on the dorm elevator for about an hour....
drunk old tina is grateful for 14 yr old tina for placing glow-in-the-dark stickers on my light switch...just avoided so many injuries
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
like seriously. this whole place is the shit. like i can move clouds. no other way to explain it but i can fucking move clouds.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
When you get shitfaced you find strippers when I get shitfaced I speak to woodland creatures, do you see the dilema?
I just opened a pickle jar stoned as fuck. I clapped for myself. I feel like wonder woman.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
Randomize
