you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I wish i knew how bad drinking and hieghts were before i got up here
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
That explains waking up with one hand in the toilet and the other in the trash can
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
guess who's eating a vending machine cheese danish, has no panties on, and is still the classiest bitch at this bus stop?
Who the hell poured a whole pouch of Capri Sun down my throat last night?
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
Everything tastes like Lysol. Am I dying?
All she kept whispering was put your pickle in my mouth. Then she fell out of her barstool and chipped her tooth
It feels kinda weird thanking you for sucking my dick, but I just don't know what else to do right now
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
You need to come back and help me drink our beer so the fridge has room for the other beers
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
Randomize
