I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
When he brought me into his room he showed me his James Bond calendar and matching sheets, and then told me that his goal in life is to be James Bond….epic fail. Mission Impossible. I was scared to take off his boxers to find out that they were also James Bond themed.
RUN LIKE YOUR JAMES BOND
Would the plural word for douche be deese? "Look at these deese bags"?
Are you high?
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
I am not ready to suck todays dick. Todays dick just laughed and came on my face.
The least you could do before I go into your room is throw away the condom wrapper from the other girl I know you're banging.
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
Still dying that you shit outside
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
i'm 99% sure they had an orgy while i was passed out
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
Was cussing out our DD when one of the strippers takes him backstage. WTF
They call him magic hands is all I know.
Somethings are best left a mystery
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