As a matter of fact my bong is named Hulkamania brother
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I think that "I fucked your little brother" wasn't the best way to introduce yourself.....
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I can't ever date him again. Whenever I see his face I just remember helplessly pissing myself in my car.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
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