sorry i walked in and ruined it, but i had to laugh she looked like a pile of bologna the way you had her pinned up on the wall
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
we were like drunken butterflies among sober caterpillars,
Just ran interference for her again. Sometimes i wonder how many times in my life i'll have to be a cock block at the clinic
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
Well then. It seems like we have a Mexican standoff of genitals
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
I'm drinking vodka. Get ready for my famous "come over" mass snapchats
I just sat watching friends in the bathtub by candlelight...nights like this make me wonder if I ever want to be in a relationship again
You were petting a 40 year old man's moustache for 15 minutes
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
at this point I think you're judging my taste in men
I swear I'm not
It's okay, I'm judging my taste in men
That’s all I need in life: vibrators, butt plugs, strawberry lube, and sour gummies
Randomize
