he pointed at my clit and asked with a confused face, 'whats this thingy??"
I would rather wake up to a truck driver than wake up to her
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
i woke up the next morning in a pool of blood in my bathroom and a pinata donkeys head in my bed
so much for an anticlimactic 22nd birthday
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I cant believe you made me read bad furry sexts
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
That’s the third time this month he’s hooked up with a girl by telling her it’s his bachelor party, and he’s not even dating a chick let alone engaged.
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