This old guy in denny's is sitting alone and he is looking at us and laughing for no reason
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
its raining. im dressed as yoda and im trick or treating alone. and i wonder why im still a virgin..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
I said "have a good day officer and I'll see you friday when I get arrested for being too drunk.."
Look, the fact that I didn't kick him out and rip your clothes off speaks very highly of me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Okay she just told me to turn the volume down on the fan. What does this even mean?
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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