So i got in my car, the seats are leaned back, and soft soul music is playing. Wtf happened last night.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Semen is not good for contacts.
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
so all I remember is hig-fiving the cop and then sprinting away. considering I'm not in jail, I count that as a win.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Randomize
