I would like to meet someone who actually lost their virginity in a candle filled room
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I have a drunk 6th sense to lyrics of songs i dont know. It only works when i dance..
My mom said I should get that 'not fucking anybody' problem fixed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Now there are two cop cars. If I go to jail I just would like to thank you for making me wear boxers.
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't always steal things but when i do it is a six foot five dos equis guy
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
He wants me to fart in his mouth and is offering me SOOOO much coke. I'm stuck between a rock and a hard place. GIVE ME ADVICE.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
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