ah, there's nothing like waking up to picture messages of a strange man's cock. life is good.
haha, that's fucked up. flacid cock pictures are the mental breakfast of champions.
If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
he threw my burrito on the ground and said im too drunk. fuck that guy.
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
what do i owe you?
$237.46 to be exact.
if im having that much fun on the weekend i better start remembering it.
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
It's so weird fucking this kids aunt then going to the gym with him everyday, but my sick minded self loves it.
Naw dude theres seriously a lobster in my sock drawer. Why?
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Randomize
