I assume you are not resopnding because you are having sex thus i give you a text message high five
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
If it looks really sketchy and smells like burnt pizza and pot you're in the right place
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I heard them banging and it sounded like he was trying to stuff a fucking coconut into her
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I know I'm going to throw up tonight it's just a matter of when and where
I'm disease and pregnancy free. This is an Easter for the books!
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
Randomize
