she just sneezed while going down on me. is it rude for me to ask her to do it again?
every time I worry about a career mistake, I remember Michelle Pfeiffer did Grease 2.
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
She dropped a weight class after every shot I took. I thought I was just drink something magical.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
Btw sorry for throwing that bag of ice at your face lastnight....
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
So I come home this morning to get ready for a job interview and there is garlic seasoning all over the hardwood and a knife in the wall. What. the. fuck.
i was watching the elves fighting on my knees while waiting for the shrooms to kick in then i realized
Randomize