So I just watched the Lakers/Magic game so I could have something to talk about with him after we have sex this time
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
When you started Hi-fiving people I knew u were fucking gone. You slapped some dude on the shoulder when he wouldn't hi-five you and he asked if he even knew you
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
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Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
i have to go- we're throwing the dummy from the balcony again
its like the body should be a temple but we treat it like a kmart
Just had the moment before I realised I'd packed you off in an ambulance last night after funnel-feeding you Monster and vodka. Your mom thinks I'm a dick doesn't she?
I just watched some guy take a shot of jack Daniels, chase it with a shot of ciroc & then violently rip his pants off. You have to come here.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've had three separate encounters with cops in the last 9 hours.... In two different states
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
There's a cute bearded guy at this brew fest wearing a kilt and selling mead
TELL HIM ABOUT MY DOWRY!!!
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
He literally shoved the EMT, climbed in the back of the ambulance with his vodka and was like, "C'mon, people. Wrap this up. I got shit to do."
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