I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
He woke up, mumbled "silverware", and went back to sleep
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
They told him he could only pay in monopoly money and he pulls out a wad of it from his pocket... i think im in love
Randomize
