i couldnt tell she was wearing a bumpit until she started giving me head
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
it was like he was trying to blow his nose in my vagina
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Remember...the emancipation proclimation is your favorite document, you love asian women, japanese food is the tits, and you willfully employ as many latinos as possible...
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
Basically as long as the fan is pointed at my vagina i can cool off enough to sleep.
I will turn myself into a beacon of get at me bro
I feel badly that he has cancer, but this does not mean I am obligated to have sex with him. Again.
I'm topless, wearing a fur coat, stink of sex, and eating dim sum. 2015 is off to a great start.
How do you explain to your parents that you can't go to the library because you got banned for being drunk in there... on a Sunday afternoon?
That's $100,000 of quality education right there.
Randomize
