is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
i'm too stoned to be pregnant. the kicking is morse code for wanting beef jerky.
we didnt even have break up sex...
you had it for us with someone else...
sorry can't. you know Saturday is the masturbating day for single sorority girls here.
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
I was picked up from his hotel room at 5 a.m. and came home with my panties and jäger in a McDonald's bag so the desk attendant wouldn't judge me. This is what single at 25 is about.
She had like a side ponytail and hoop earrings though. And legwarmers. Like a horrible 80s nightmare. Don't drink and dream, dude.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
Have you ever had a pregnancy test laugh at you?
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