Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
This Casey James character from American Idol is really gonna mess up my sex life.
Or maybe the fact that you know who Casey James is will be what messes up your sex life.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
I learned an important lesson last night: Jameson giveth, but Jameson also taketh away.
Cruelly.
He had the smallest penis i'd ever seen. I can see why he drinks his life away.
hooked up with the gay kid & his friend's mom told me "you know he has a identical twin brother whose straight, right?"
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
I tried to stop that, but then I pulled the leaves out of my panties and went to sleep.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
Randomize