I think i sorta joined a cult last night
i was rollin on her like bob the builder
maybe i'll make good life choices and keep my legs closed. periodically txt me friday and saturday night saying "baby carrot round 2" that should stop me.
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
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Whiskey dick has taught us to be smart with our time.
Did you seriously just hashtag my sex life as #yolo2013?
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
she wanted me to tie her up with my playstation charger cord. i kept on hoping she wasn't a squirter. those cords r expensive. could have def been a Sony commercial tho
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
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I'm content with our "friends with accidental benefits" situation.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Because talking after sexting is equivalent to cuddling after sex
am i the only one who finds it a little awkward seeing as we all made out last night?
You threw up everything but your ovaries.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
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