There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
They have glow in the dark condoms. That's so scary.
Something like a penis light saber.
Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
I wish I could but I can't. No beer pong or sex on a hammock...such an unproductive weekend
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
He congratulated me by offering up free orgasms.. I told him I also had a birthday last month we needed to celebrate.. He was there in ten minutes.
you know you need to get laid when: getting wrestled to the ground in a self-defense class turns you on....p.s. this is a booty call
What conversation warrents "penis" in rainbow comic sans
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