She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
my new favorite insult= "thundercunt"
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
Got head last night. Had the 3D glasses on the whole time.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Whenever you're sad about your life, just remember that I'm on a first name basis with the late night taco bell drive-thru workers.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I am going to paint butt plugs like little Christmas trees and give them as gifts.
You could paint cock rings as wreaths.
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
Randomize
