I cockslap morals
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
Ya know, in a round about way coinstar is just a glorified vending machine for all my bad choices.
at what point did you see referring to the bartender as 'the white precious' a good idea??
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I just saw Jonah Hill at LAX and decided my fat fetish is back
You should go to counseling for that
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Turns out the old man beside me in the waiting room was dead, but other then that it was a good day.
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I swear going to your house is like going to a strip club, no matter what happens I get glitter on me.
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
He lasted less than 30 sec. in bed and then sent me a friend request on LinkedIn. Wtf.
Randomize