as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Leaving ole miss girls house to go to the stripper girls house. Why did it take losing my job to start getting laid all the damn time?
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel bad for the cleaning lady. All you can smell is latex and Jaegermeister
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
For graduation he gave me roses, a giraffe necklace, and a butt plug. I think this might be my one shot at true love
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
Whose panties are you wearing on your head and why are you sending me pics of it?
You like that 95% of the time I masterbate I think bout you?
Just wanna know what I can I do to earn the other 5%
Yoooooo, the fat magician married the chick I dumped a beer on after I got pissed he was flirting with her in front of me
Randomize