He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
any advancement on the stomach flu vs. pregnancy scare of '10?
260 beers this month. I need a new hobby.
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
We got caught having sex in the bathroom by my professor. In accordance with tradition, we still brofisted. I think my grade went up considerably.
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
I heard moaning and ass slapping and sponge bob.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
Just woke up from an extremely erotic dream featuring Steve Buscemi. Now I can't sleep.
If you hear death cries, thats me singing. Just let me be.
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Guess who won a basket of sex toys in front of his parents, aunts, uncles, sister, and cousin...
Randomize
