That ginger could cleveland steamer me and it would still be the best day of my life
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
By the way, her vagina was so tight i was worried that i would be stuck forever
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Apparently, his doctor was impressed with how well we took care of his leg. We're like the kings of naked triage.
I feel like someone had their period in my eyes.
I'm sorry I got a little outta control last night.
first time i ever mailed panties back to a fuck buddy. what better of a way to say its over
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
Fuck I forgot the furry convention was this weekend and now I'm downtown. Way too high for this shit.
I want a shirt that says, "I'm sorry for the things I said when it was Taco Tuesday"
you were grinding on the cop whispering for him to lend you his tazer.
Randomize
