im walking the streets of bville with a bag of cat food..looking for my car. i dont ever want to turn 21 again.
I just had a dream where Bob Saget recognized me from when I hung out with him in a dream I had months ago.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
All I've had today is a brownie and a shot of Jack, so you know. I'm doing ok.
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
If I had a dollar for every straight boy that questioned their sexuality because of me, I would live a comfortable middle-class life.
I'm gay. Congratulations to whoever had January 2014 in their pool.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
Randomize