I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
I swear god or herbie drove my car home
Note: footlong is not the password to the subway wi fi network.. p.s- im super high
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
Tonights dinner consisted of washing down my plan b pill with a bottle of wine and toast. College is turning my life around
Woah there. I lasted a semester and a fourth of college not having sex. trust me when i say keeping my virginity was an obstacle course of olympic proportions.
The virgin olympics. I would win the gold. For America.
holy shit thats the most artistic dick pic ever
. Drop what your doing. Were going to Knoxville for midget wrestling. It's the championship.we can NOT miss this.
The only math I use in every day life is figuring out how much I can spend on alcohol and still have money to pay my bills. High school lied to us.
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
Dude, I woke up with wet dollar bills in my boxers where did you take me???
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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