she was so not down for the gang bang
Sweater Vest, Chin Strap, Beard, sporting a white Beret- Please don't ever let me be THAT guy.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hello rock bottom. My name is Jared. Nice to meet you.
which gay bar do you need a ride home from?
Ha Ha the cop that just pulled me over would like me to tell you hi!
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
I had to take the fire extinguisher from him. He was just sitting on the floor petting it.
Now that we have successfully procreated, I need to know we are on the same page. Please tell me you are aware that there are whole seasons of our lives that our child can NEVER be made privy to.
We should probably write this down. That's a shit load of shit.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
You drunk? Cause I have a terrible idea...
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
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