what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
We totally just fucked in a closet. These vacations with his family are causing creativity I never thought I had.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
I just did the math. 30.36% of girls I've slept with have cheated on a significant other while doing it.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
She found the planted magnum condom..once she figured it out it was too late.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
But if you do poop yourself let me know. I want that as a tagline. "So funny she'll make you shit yourself."
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Well when I woke up this morning I didn’t think I’d be masturbating to my own LinkedIn profile today but here we are
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