So I went into my gym pretty wasted and asked the trainer guy if i could order a cock meat sandwich. Needless to say, I'm canceling my membership tomorrow.
she tasted like a mixture of sweat and destiny
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
NEVERCLEAR, NEVER AGAIN.
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
And I just realized we will be at a strip club when the end of the world is supposed to happen. This is destiny
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I'm pretty sure there a million tiny ninjas in my uterus poking me with sticks.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Came home to butt plugs and dildos in the bathroom sink WTF
Spring cleaning
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
Randomize
