I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
New low: just hacked my moms facebook
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
The gyno asked how many partners i've had... I said ummmm she goes ok then i'll just put down ten.
You pulled down your pants, pissed in the recliner, and wiped yourself with my utility bill. I thought it was in the worlds best interest to put you to bed.
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
I'm eating captain crunch out of a cup half full of beer so idk
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
If if makes you feel any better, you're definitely the hottest guy I've ever friendzoned.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
Randomize
