You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
My mom is getting really tired of hearing the excuse 'it's 5 oclock somewhere'
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
A picture just appeared on facebook. I am puking in the toilet, you are next to me puking in the sink. I think we have our christmas card.
I just discovered the Reese's pieces and sourdough bread sandwich. No signs of coming down.
i got a standing ovation for bringing skittles to the party
he told me i could have the honorable privilege of being the second girl to have sex with him in his new apartment, what a gentleman.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I apologize for tapping your ass. It was a friendly tap. Like Casper. Ya know
Just threw up in the shower. Hangovers at 23 are the best.
Text me if something catches fire and I will put pants on
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
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