found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
Isiahs hammered. And just came in to get his skateboard and said he has to prove something. This can't end well
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
malibu coconut giveth, and malibu coconut taketh away
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
Im also drinking whiskey while on a treadmill wearing high heels so let's consider that for a moment.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
You know it's a good Halloween party when a guy wearing a light-up sombrero offers you blow.
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
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