sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
he told us the story of how he fought ketchup, mustard, and thomas the train engine all in one night. if that doesn't sound like an acid trip i dont know what does.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
Wow. Thanks for becoming another fan of something on Facebook. You make me want to gouge my eyes out.
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
As I type I'm climbing my cousins swingset so I can take a nap inside the slide. Fuck this hangover. I always win.
Can I just put my face in your boobs and forget the world?
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
So how do you explain to your boss that Siri called him mid sex?
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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