when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
I wish they had a home preganacy test, but for STDs
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
so we’ve decided to fuck for our own health
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Word. I want it involving like... sing-a-longs and sniffing glue.
Randomize
