her eyes looked like someone had poured fruit punch in them. needless to say we had a good time.
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
My glasses smell like tequila. I just put them on and almost threw up.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's not quite a landing strip... It's more like a soul patch for my vagina.
Saturday at 4 is jello wrestling sponsored by the senior class council. That's why my school is awesome. Boom.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
Powdered alcohol is a real thing now. Move over crystal light... Water bottles rejoice!!
If you had been home 20 minutes ago, you probably would've caught me masturbating, so it might be for the best.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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