He never called back after I emailed him my booty call contract.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
So thats when I found out ur supposed to put the penut butter on your balls not your dogs balls, feels alot better
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
i said she could sleep in my bed and she goes "iiiiiiii warned you. iiiiim a cuddlerrrrrr!" slightly regretting this..
the paramedics asked what clubs id be in next weekend so they can plan ahead.
Last night was the first and hopefully last night I will ever sleep in a hotel bath tub. Sober mind you.
I'm not even gonna ask.
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Eating a chocolate bar and crying over a cobweb. Life is beautiful and I love shrooms.
Noo.... Like in the attic of a crack house with nitrous and fat chicks weird....
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
Why is there a traffic cone in the shower? And did you wash it with my body wash? It smells nice.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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